Batman vs. Ra’s al Ghul #3 (of 6): Wrongheadedness and Guile

The cover of LAST issue foreshadowed for us that Batman had been sent to a sword and sorcery dimension. Just the cover, though. None of that was in the actual issue. In this issue, however, last issue’s cover does pay off, with shirtless bearded Batman fighting with a barbarian tribe, then befriending them for three seconds before Chiarascuro shows up and yells the following at him:
“YOU WERE WARNED, LITTLE MAN!!! AND NOW YOU PAY FOR YOU WRONGHEADEDNESS AND GUILE!!!”
And then Batman’s response is to put on a chrome version of his mask, but only the front-head part, and he says, “Pennyworth”.
Chiarascuro thinks “???” and asks “What is that?”
Batman answers, “Protection.”
She says, “From gases… and weapons?
He says, “Yep.”
She says, “I see… clever.”
He says, “I think so”.

So they talk a little more, and then at one point, he says “Damn skippy.” which I think that in almost 85 years of Batman stories, this might be the first time Batman has said “yep” OR “damn skippy”.

But the reason I point out this exchange is that it is a good example of how the dialogue in this miniseries is such a big distraction, because it makes no sense.
For example, Chiarascuro shows up telling Batman he’d “been warned” and accusing him of “wrongheadedness and guile.”A lot of finger-pointing, considering she magically dumped him in a fantasy dimension where he has to fight orcs…
Also, this is the first time we’ve seen them interact at all, so whatever she is yelling about happened off-panel, which just clarifies for us that a whole chapter is missing.  I don’t mind putting pieces together, in fact I love it, but maybe don’t emphasize these gaps?
Why does he say “Pennyworth?”  Why is she talking about “gases?” It doesn’t cover his whole face. It’s definitely not a gas mask.
How is it clever to wear a helmet? It’s certainly practical, but is it “clever”? She is really impressed with this weird partial helmet that wouldn’t actually even stay on his head.
But that is just an example. Most of the exchanges are this opaque.
But speaking of missing chapters, remember how last issue ended with Ra’s and Man-Bat about to have a big fight in the Batcave? Man-Bat being unhinged with murderous rage that was boiling off the page in huge bloody letters?  OK, well, in THIS issue, there’s no reference to that at all. Did that fight happen?  No clue.  All we see of Ra’s is that he’s on the news talking to a journalist about how he helped Gotham City with the riots in #1.

Doppelganger Bruce, despite not having any memories of being Batman, is in fact still filling in as Batman and has all of his fighting skills.  He and Tim take out the robot controlling villain from #1. Then they go back to the mansion and dither. They have a cerebro-like helmet that gives Damian back his memories, which leads to an absolutely wonderful rendition of a smiling child, just a great panel from Neal. Really for me, it was the high point of the issue.
At one point in this scene at the Manor, Chiarascuro and Real Batman appear unnoticed in a corner.  Batman looks extremely sneaky and pulls a bunch of what looks like folded up towels but are probably papers out of a file cabinet.  It’s a funny panel. What were they doing there, though? Eh, who cares?

Batman and Chiarascuro bop back to the barbarian world in a boom tube, and Deadman gets sucked in and joins them. He has a physical body there. He beats up an orc and takes his shoes.  Chiarascuro decapitates a flying dinosaur and the three of them eat it on a spit.
But the issue ends with a bang! Deadman is filling Bruce in on what the Manor Crew and Doppelganger Bruce are doing, and together they crack the case and figure out what Ra’s evil plan has been about all along!  MAJOR SPOILER AHEAD!
I hope your sitting down, because this is HUGE. Ra’s plan is UNTHINKABLE.
I almost don’t want to say it…..
(spoilers)
Deadman: “It was like… I don’t know…. like “Bruce” was going to sell part of your company to… To Ra’s Al Ghul.”
Bruce: “Lord. This is VERY bad.”
TO BE CONTINUED!!!!!!

Yeah! Good luck waiting a month for answers on THAT one!
So, what I have described of course doesn’t make a lot of sense, and the dialogue is only useful for something quirky and fun to try to decipher, but this story is beautiful to look at, and the whimsical “anything goes and nothing matters” feel to it is actually refreshing in a Zen koan sort of way. So, yes, I do  love it. It makes no sense and I love it.